parenting children and dogs

 

                                                        Parent First, Friend Second.

                                                  Parenting children and dogs

 We will all have been in the supermarket and witnessed children begging and pleading with mum for that ‘something ‘they simply must have. We will also probably have witnessed some children demanding it as their right! But what would we do in that situation and why do some children beg and plead, some demand, and some not even bother to ask - instead they just look.

We can blame the supermarkets for putting such tempting things where the children can see and touch them, from toys down to the tasty colourful sweets at the checkout, good for business but not good for parenting.  But if we are going to blame the supermarkets how come some of those children either ask politely or simply ignore the temptation. Go on, I can hear you saying it, “They’ve been parented!”  We will probably know by looking at them which children have and which haven’t, and there’s often a little band of ‘inbetweeners’ who have tried very hard, read all the books, listened to all the advice and suddenly found themselves drowning in a world of mixed messages and information. 

We can’t ignore what children need but we don’t have to pander to what children want. In fact I can remember when three months before Christmas children suddenly became very well behaved, even offering to do household chores, because, ‘Santa might not come unless  you are very good’. Furthermore their letters to Santa were hand written, posted up the chimney and asked for simple things - for to ask for something really big might mean nothing at all! Children learned that to simply ‘want’ wasn’t always enough; sometimes they had to earn what they wanted.

Parenting isn’t easy and sometimes it is easier to just let them get on with it. But good parenting isn’t about taking the easy route it’s about doing what is right, protecting our children and making sure they grow up with values, good manners and respect for others. Good parenting with love and respect is a road to good friends but trying to start parenting in the teen years is nigh on impossible, the foundations for the relationship need laying much sooner so that on the journey to adult hood and beyond a solid friendship is formed.

Bringing up a dog, is little different to the parenting of a child, it’s easy to give in to the cute puppy, or the rescue that hasn’t had a good start in life, but to give in can end up with even more hard work later on. You can change the ‘goal posts’ with a child by way of a verbal explanation but you can’t do that with a dog and the first few months of a puppy’s life, and the first few days of a rescue being in your home are vital to set the boundaries for good parenting. A puppy that is allowed to roam anywhere it wants, scramble on furniture and demand attention all the time is in danger of being a demanding and bad mannered teenager. A rescue dog needs guidelines and until it’s settled those guidelines can be difficult to explain, so rather than it be confusing it needs simplicity for the first few days.

There is little more rewarding than a dog’s loving gaze, a dog that wants to be with you and is happy to play, walk or rest as long as it is with you. But it’s no easier than parenting a child, in fact it can harder because there is a language barrier to cope with but the rewards at the end of it make it well worth the effort.

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